Goodbye Old Friend

To us, having the Kitty Hawk around means longer lines in the NEX, no parking spots anywhere, the gym packed and smelling like old socks, not having anything to rent at the movie rental, and the commissary runnning out of steak and sour cream.

But this week, the Navy has sent the rusty ole pile of oily metal they call the Kitty Hawk, on its final voyage. Goodbye old friend! I hate to see so much metal going for scrap, and I'm not sure what the plans are for it are, perhaps to turn it into some sort of museum at its new permanent parking space on a coast back home. I have a few suggestions:

1) Put wheels on it and turn it into the new Kitty Hawk Bookmobile, and drive it through the economically disadvantaged neighborhoods of Minneapolis, taking care when rounding tight corners.

2) Turn it sideways and move it to Tokyo, turn it into the new Kitty Hawk Parking Garage, charge 1000 yen each half hour for parking, and staff it with recently retired salarymen in uniform and beautiful young ladies in kimono.

3) The new Kitty Hawk Bed and Breakfast, complete with narrow cots for the guests and its own Starbucks in the basement

4) Kitty Puppy Pet Board and Lodge

5) Move it back to the Yokosuka base and turn it into an ancillary classroom building for the senior high.

6) the Kitty Hawk Bar and Grill with extended kitchen space

7) Move it to Las Vegas and turn it into the Lady Kitty Luck Casino.

8) Move it to the state fair grounds in California and turn it into the Pirate's Lair Haunted House.

9) The Kirin Kitty Kitty Love Hotel, in the outskirts of Tokyo: 4000 yen for a "rest" or 15, 000 yen for overnight.

10) The Asahi Hello Kitty Hawk Love Hotel, same area, painted pink, 5000 yen for a rest and 20,000 for overnight

Just a few ideas.